a very saddy shitty entry

hmm, right now perasaan mokcik berewang-rewang memikirkan sesuatu yang telah menjangkau fikiran mokcik. mokcik memikirkan about "my self". i never wanna think about my self before this. but right now (suddenly), i'm thinking about my self! about how people please me when i'm beside them, there for them, be the one who support them in many ways, never give up to loving them and will always love them. but nobody i repeat NOBODY! appereciate that! thank you! thank you to you coz you have ruin my life. you make my heart break in to thousand pieces!

my mom always said that "do not be sooooo nice with people you know even you have be friend with them for many years" but i'm not like that mom. i'm sorry. i know there's a curse when i disobey your advise. but that is not me. i love my friend. for me, a friend is my pecious gift i ever had. but now, that 'precious thing' hurting me. hurting me deep-deep inside my heart. i have nobody to tell what i feel, what i wanna share.

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i know that i'm ugly. yeah, i addmit that i'm fatso, blacky, and shorty. but i have a pure heart that contains a love to be shared. a heart that wanna the love one take care of her heart. never ashamed or make fun of her. hmm i know that i'm not and will never be slimmer, prettier and whiter. thank you. thank you so much coz let me know your true skin. its not to late to know the real you. i don't want to be your first one, but i want to be your last. but right now, i will make like nothing happens and still will never change the love for you.

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girls always make fun of other girls and that will repeat again and again and again. i have so many friends. i know majority of my friend have a dark background. but that doesn't mean i'm like them. i'm original and i'm in my own line. i know the bads and goods, the truth and false, the islam rules. i'm not like a bitch out there who know the islam rules but never want to follow it! you are wasting your time by hating me because of my friends. FYI, i always laugh at you. because you have a brain to think but you never used it. you never wanna know why i be friend with people like them. and you have a good brain to study the thing you want(eg: for your studies only) but you never want to study the life. you know, the life is so beautiful. but because of narrow minded people like you, many people suffer! you, "the brain genius"! try to think about life. you never enjoy the life. thats why you never want to study the life. life is a giftfrom allah to let us enjoy it and to learn from it. and listen here, yeah, i maybe can forgive what have you one to me but, i'll never forget. try to understand your self and get a life!